Monday 1 July 2013

26/52


Grace: having a giggle under the orange tree - heavily laden with her fruits
Tom: he told me with much sincerity that if there was a tornado the rooster would spin right off into the air!

Ok, so I am a bit behind with my weekly portraits of Grace and Tom. I have narrowed this down to the fact that I have shared custody and only every second week are they by my side. Monday's are becoming increasingly harder, I send them off to school knowing that they will not be coming home in the afternoon. Someone who is a stranger to me picks them up - for the next seven days Grace, Tom and I are only connected by a telephone conversation that never lasts long enough. The mother in me yearns for them, I want them to be tangible to me, I want to hold Tom's hand as he falls asleep. I miss my grown up conversations with Gracie.

Ian know's I am different on Mondays'. I stare vacantly for minutes on end - my mind is lost somewhere in the past week where I was surrounded by their laughter, homework and toys strewn across the house. My babies aren't home. It doesn't, and never will feel right.

Ian offers me insight and gives me strength in the weeks we are alone.I remind myself that everything I have done was only ever with the best intentions, even if I was somewhat immature and misguided. I guess hindsight is a wonderful thing - if only we had it when we needed it.

That is why my photographs are so important to me, they re-ignite feelings that were vivid during the moment that has been captured. They make the week easier to get through.


Playing along with Jodi -  "A portrait of my children, once a week, every week, in 2013."

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